Apr 21, 2014

Earthquake. Richter Scale: 10

My world shifted three days ago.  Almost like an earthquake, but more subtle than that.  Sort of like being in the Gale's house, but sleeping through the whole part where the tornado moves from Kansas to Oz.

Everything is different.  Different.  I feel different.  Different how?

My heart feels rounder.  Like the edges are those rounded corners squares.  Detached, but grounded. Dreamlike reality.

Externally, nothing's really changed. I'm still going to wake up tomorrow morning and go to work.  Still going to berate myself for not being perfect.  Still worry about all the promises I've made and today's work that I'm putting off until tomorrow.  Still going to pick stupid fights and be upset about the tightness I can feel in my lips and the stress that I'm holding in my shoulders.  Still going to freak out when I don't know what someone's talking about and worry that I'm leaving something important out.  Or that I'll be passed over for a promotion or that someone else is going to steal my cookie.  I'm still fearful.  I'm still stressed.  I'm still a day dreamer.  I talk about plans too much, and I don't spend enough time in the trenches.

But it's all _different_.

I saw my future.

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