Our lives revolved around yours, I realize now. I wonder, now, years distant from it, if you were the only person who noticed. In some way, you were the gravity of the nucleus, that thing that held us all together.
Still holds us all.
We didn't know it at the time, but I see now, later, how the potentiality that we vested in you weighed down your own soul the heaviest.
If I could give you one thing it would be the reassurance that I have not forgotten you but that you are not the central point, not for me, not any longer. If there is any freedom in that, it is yours. What ever consolation that is, it's less than you deserve.
....
Speaking to my mother on the phone a few weeks (days?) ago, she asked me again what I did. For a living. What is it, she asked, what is it that you do for that company that you're working for?
How do you not know. How. How. How.
The Lord, he knows. He knows I tried. And Lord, he *knows* _how_ I tried.
Lord, I tried.
...
Living in the shadows comes easy to those who have been granted free passage amongst them.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Reflections on Totalitariansm
I'm still working on Hannah Arendt's The Origins of Totalitarianism . It's dense and a great read and I'd also very much li...
-
It's time for the annual year of reading review. There's a number of books on the list this year that really deserve a longer blurb... -
..jpg)
Edgar Degas was obsessed with the female form. This much was obvious just from the few works that they had from him at MASP. I would go fu... -
Once, a long long time ago, I met a man who told me things I have not yet been able to forget. These things number two. The first was that...
No comments:
Post a Comment